tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-104704702011-08-15T03:53:58.027-04:00Jeff Gannon is not my name and I am in no way pretending to be anyone else whose name isn't really Jeff Gannon. J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.comBlogger1241100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1145497165782955352006-04-19T20:01:00.000-04:002006-06-26T18:24:00.416-04:00

I must say that I am TOUCHED. Several dozens of thousands of MY FANS have made it clear to me that I should put my HAT IN THE RING and apply to be the next press secretary for our Commander AND Chief, George W. Bush. And while I know that I would kick MAJOR ASS during all confrontations with LIBELOUS LEFTY SWILL MERCHANTS, I must say that I wasn't super stoked about the whole idea after reading

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1140580435639996862006-02-21T22:53:00.000-05:002006-02-22T16:39:33.016-05:00

The MAIN REASON I haven't been shoe-polish reporting very often is because I underwent a LIFESTYLE CHANGE THAT I'D RATHER NOT TALK ABOUT. But I will talk about it because I AM ALWAYS HONEST WITH MY FANS/READERS. But only a little because IT WAS ONLY A PHASE AND I AM BACK TO NORMAL.So that's THAT. Now here are a few of the HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of letters/emails I get HOURLY. (I changed the names

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1140569719934922472006-02-21T19:48:00.000-05:002006-02-21T19:55:20.006-05:00

I've gotten all your mail. I UNDERSTAND YOU ALL MISS ME. Please think of me as the HALEY'S COMIT of SHOE-POLISH REPORTING. You've got a few more hours to get your comments/questions/tips/compliments in before I post my HUGELY POPULAR semi-regular feature.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1133233836658781872005-11-28T21:17:00.000-05:002005-11-28T22:12:31.703-05:00

This summer I shoe-polish reported the story of CGI Bob Novak, a creation of the INCREASINGLY DANGEROUS MOB OF LA LUNATICS. Well, the LOONEY LEFTIST LIBERAL ELITES of WACKOWOOD are at it again. According to several HONEST AND RIGHTWARD THINKING key grips and best boys I probed in a trailer on the set, today's TOTALLY FICTIONAL PRESS CONFERENCE was in fact written by Sam Seder, a LIFETIME SHOWBIZ

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com49tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1132117656685105932005-11-16T00:02:00.000-05:002005-11-16T00:07:36.760-05:00

But a GOOD HOT TIP is only the starting point for an EXPERIENCED SHOE POLISH REPORTER. It's time to DO SOME PROBING. Stay tuned . . .

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1130611048028378012005-10-29T14:04:00.000-04:002006-01-08T00:35:29.210-05:00

Based on my GROUNDBREAKING SHOE POLISH REPORTAGE, I'm sure most of you assume that I am this mysterious "Official A" named in PATRICKY FITZLOONEYTOONLIBERAL'S indictment. And even though I know EVERYTHING about this case, I am NOT "OFFICIAL A."But this indictment is CRAZY. It's like he's trying to CRIMINALIZE APPLE PIE. What's next, an indictment for BREATHING!!!ANYWAY, my guess is that justice

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1130557000932997002005-10-28T23:21:00.000-04:002005-10-28T23:36:41.010-04:00

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1130034353470602132005-10-22T22:11:00.000-04:002005-10-22T22:25:53.523-04:00

WACKY LIBERALS EVERYWHERE are trashing sweet, sweet Hariet Meyers and I'm getting SICK OF IT. Number one, she's friggin SWEET AS HELL. B) She KNOWS PRESIDENT BUSH REALLY GOOD! C)She went to LAW SCHOOL.But most importantly, I know some stuff THAT YOU DON'T about HARRIET MYERS. TRUST ME. She's going to KICK SOME EFFING ASS at the SUPREME COURTHOUSE because she is so GODDAMN SWEET.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1129607250163563422005-10-17T23:34:00.000-04:002005-10-17T23:47:30.213-04:00

Trust me. Dick is a prober, not a probee.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1129176877953914112005-10-13T00:07:00.000-04:002005-10-13T00:15:11.600-04:00

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1125694345706362132005-09-02T16:51:00.000-04:002005-09-03T01:19:24.223-04:00

Update: Somebody gets it:Another question. Why is this smug woman holding up stupid signs instead of volunteering somewhere to help refugees from New Orleans?I mean people are dying and all she can do is kick off her shoes and play politics!

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1124419607148502892005-08-18T22:41:00.000-04:002005-08-18T22:46:47.176-04:00

Will hopefully have some big news for you soon. I'm just a bit DISTRACTED because of all the HEARTFELT THINKING I've been doing the last couple days.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1124162424940658292005-08-15T23:45:00.000-04:002005-08-15T23:53:32.566-04:00

FAKE HOMOSEXUAL LEFTY Jimi Hendrix has joined the MILITANT HIPPY TERROR SQUAD. Although long thought dead, I can state with the CERTAINTY OF A SHOE POLISH VETERAN that this BARBARIC HIPPIE is alive and well. How do I know? Simple. I PROBED HIM MYSELF.On faking his death: Arlo told me to do it," Jimi admitted. "He said pretending to be gay might not work in the future because the military was

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1124033037315723342005-08-14T11:28:00.000-04:002005-08-14T11:36:52.966-04:00

It is appearing more and more likely that diplomacy will not work with this crew of radicals. DEMOCRATS WITH VIOLENT PASTS are flocking to the scene and a few skirmishes have ALREADY ERUPTED.Chronic FLIP-FLOPPING NORTHEAST MOLESTER APPEASING John Kerry is in town asking THE GOD FEARING LOCALS if he can borrow their WAR MEDALS and throw them into President Bush's KICK ASS RANCH.Though he was

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123957784509370122005-08-13T14:19:00.000-04:002005-08-13T14:36:33.866-04:00

Nouvelle GannonI still get urges.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123944117569709612005-08-13T09:39:00.000-04:002005-08-13T10:41:57.630-04:00

In an EXCLUSIVE 5-minute PROBING OF THE PRESIDENT, I unvarnished this juicy nugget of a scoop: Our HUMBLE President has decided to only use violence against the BARBARIC HIPPIES WHO HAVE INVADED HIS GOD-FEARING HOME TOWN as a last resort."All options are on the table," Bush, speaking at his ranch in Crawford, Texas, said. Asked if that included the use of force, Bush replied: "As I say, all

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123886076120240632005-08-12T18:24:00.000-04:002005-08-12T18:34:36.126-04:00

I don't have time to deal with this NONSENSE because I'm going out to research the Crawford night life in a few minutes. Could someone please straighten out this well-intentioned, YET BONKERS, LEFTY LIBERAL?Doug said... What "noble cause" did any American service person die for in Bush's invasion of Iraq? Our armed forces are in Iraq to make Bush and his cronies richer. Period. End of story. That

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123802716930420812005-08-11T18:54:00.000-04:002006-06-21T21:52:03.663-04:00

This one's a DOOZY guys. While our WORKAHOLIC PRESIDENT tries to get away for a LITTLE BREATHER, scores of BONKERS HIPPIES have surrounded the city and are BRAINWASHING THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN. After spending a few hours probing six or seven ADMINISTRATION OFFICIALS, I decided to do what I do best: I polished up my trusty brown Nun Bush's and hit the streets. First I talked to the GOD-FEARING

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123732439054901602005-08-10T23:31:00.000-04:002005-08-10T23:53:59.060-04:00

Another great shoe-polish reporter, Bill O'Reilly, does his best to talk some sense into one of the many BRAINWASHED MOMS WITH DEAD SONS who are attempting to disrupt the WAR ON TERRORISM. Won't be long until I'm on the ground in Crawford . . .

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123715507863572072005-08-10T18:53:00.000-04:002006-06-24T16:02:02.133-04:00

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123542162482389642005-08-08T18:03:00.000-04:002005-08-08T20:15:27.066-04:00

The structure of my post will be that of a FLASHBACK EPISODE, similar to certain late era episodes of Family Ties or Growing Pains. The concept is that we're sitting on the sofa or hanging out in the kitchen telling entertaining stories about the past. Do you remember the time a bunch of LOONY SUSAN LIBERAL TROLLS questioned my SHOE POLISH reporting? (WAVY TRANSITION EFFECT) Wasn't that AWESOME

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123354825251341962005-08-06T14:44:00.000-04:002005-08-06T15:00:25.260-04:00

Dear Jeff,A lot of times when I try to spread the word about your TOTALLY AWESOME SITE, I have a hard time deciding which great moment in SHOE POLISH JOURNALISM to pass along to my ENTIRE ADDRESS BOOK. Any chance you could do a flash-back post, a la Family Ties?Sincerely,A HUGE FAN! I'll see what I can do.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123337455118552062005-08-06T09:50:00.000-04:002005-08-06T10:18:29.540-04:00

I'm prepared for the worse. On my way back from Niger, I had a lot of time to think about the challenge that lies ahead of me. One of the things I like to do before a tough shoe-polish assignment is to list possible ENEMIES OF THE ASSIGNMENT. Since I do most of my probing around the D.C area, I'm used to just listing an ASSORTMENT OF COCKTAIL LIMO LIBERALS, who ultimately pose no threat to my

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123335176975649982005-08-06T09:03:00.000-04:002005-08-06T09:32:56.983-04:00

My fans, by a narrow margin of 125 THOUSAND VOTES, have decided that my SHOE-POLISH SKILLS are desparately needed to investigate SHANANAGANS in OHIO-02, where CRAZY-EYED FRINGE LIBS most likely used GEEKY LEFTISH TECHNOLOGY to make it appear that PENCIL SHARPENER PAUL HACKETT came close to beating CLEAN (YET MEAN WHEN SHE NEEDS TO BE)JEAN SCHMIDT. There are countless people to probe in the

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123284737698010312005-08-05T19:18:00.000-04:002005-08-05T19:38:44.653-04:00

GOOD NEWS. On my way out of this LIBERAL OVEN OF A COUNTRY I was able to reclaim my weapon. It is now safely in my hands as I fly from Niger to my next assignment. I will announce the winner when MY POLISH HITS AMERICAN SOIL. Here's a reminder about some of the details of my weapon. And since some of you hate wasting your time clicking on link SUGGESTIONS, I will reprint instead of link:I call it

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123280172063295462005-08-05T18:14:00.000-04:002005-08-05T18:30:11.416-04:00

It's my last day in Niger and I spent my time reading a few of the MILLION EMAILS I recieve bi-hourly each day. Which is how I came across this interesting link sent to me by reader ML. First of all, that is not me. I wouldn't choose Truffaut as a username if I were to join that LUNATIC FRINGE CLAN. I would choose the username Agnes Varda. Big difference. And secondly, I don't need to do any

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123198495129217322005-08-04T20:55:00.000-04:002005-08-04T22:10:56.446-04:00

A source familiar with the situation has contacted me here in Niger (where I am investigating the WILSON FAMILY BOMB PLOT)and revealed the truth behind today's episode of Inside Politics on the LEFTIST CNN LIBERAL NETWORK.A team of LIBERAL HOLLYWOOD/FRENCH FILMMAKERS AND GEEKY LEFTIST TECHNICIANS have been working for 2 years on a CGI version of the HONORABLE ROBERT NOVAK. Not Bob (as the crew

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123198765477152152005-08-04T19:36:00.000-04:002005-08-04T19:39:25.483-04:00

Details to follow . . . I'm going through shoe-polish LIKE IT'S TAP WATER.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123195691594515452005-08-04T18:44:00.000-04:002005-08-04T18:54:30.750-04:00

Details to come . . . Also: The HEAT IN NIGER is making it dificult for my two native interns to tally all the emails. Results may be delayed. The emails that remain to be counted are all from Ohio. I better POLISH MY SHOES. It going to be a HARD DAYS NIGHT for this reporter.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123175560108713272005-08-04T13:10:00.000-04:002005-08-04T13:12:40.116-04:00

Up to date results: Ohio - 665,221 votesAlaska - 595,443 votesFlorida - 401,543 votesLouisiana - 396,255 votes

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123120106479769702005-08-03T21:27:00.000-04:002005-08-03T23:54:48.190-04:00

I like my journalism like I like my cigarettes: UNFILTERED and UVARNISHED. And in a yet another example of my supreme devotion to the craft of SHOE POLISH REPORTING, I have decided to let my HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of fans decide my next mission.Assignment #1Go to Ohio and investigate these troubling voting irregularities I have been hearing about lately. There's just no chance that the fine people

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123112031265709462005-08-03T19:30:00.000-04:002005-08-03T19:33:51.273-04:00

Details later . . .

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123046001582602372005-08-03T01:09:00.000-04:002005-08-03T01:14:19.563-04:00

Believe me, I know how hard it is to start a new blog. I took me nearly 5 days until HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of you began flocking to my site like ADDICTED BONKERS LEFTY DOPE-HOUNDS.However, that does not mean I will tolerate stuff like this, from comments: Anonymous said... I love your blog! You did an excellent job! My website is about ps3 game reviews if you would like to come and give me a

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1123040966724475992005-08-02T23:35:00.000-04:002005-08-02T23:59:50.706-04:00

These LEFTY AFRICAN AFRICANS don't give a lick about one of the GREATEST CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICTS IN THE WORLD. Sweet Southern Ohio never lets me down.So . . . how many points did SUPER CLEAN JEAN win by? 35? 45? Please let me know.I can't wait until that STAFF VOMIT non-combat BONKERS LEFTY LIBERAL returns to his job sharpening pencils with his SISSY BONKERS LIBERAL LEFTY PENCIL SHARPENER back at

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1122818037165970842005-07-31T08:14:00.000-04:002005-07-31T09:56:31.976-04:00

Although I'm actually wearing native Niger sandals, I am the very model of a kick-ass Shoe-Polish reporter. I decided that I couldn't trust the BONKERS LEFTY LIBERAL MEDIA to give me the straight story on Joe Wilson and his trip to Niger so I came to Niger myself to follow his very evil footsteps. Here is what I have found.Here is the hut that he lived in. Trust me, this is like a mansion in

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1122224943499100502005-07-24T12:59:00.000-04:002005-07-24T13:15:21.856-04:00

There are surprisingly few free wireless networks floating around the Niger air. This has not stopped my shoe-polish reporting, yet it has made it very difficult to share the mind-bending evidence I have collected suggesting that the Wilson's intended to blow up The United States. So I decided to take a bold step.I have set up a cable internet install for sometime next week, at which point the

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121870756224516752005-07-20T10:41:00.000-04:002005-07-20T10:45:56.313-04:00

But I will have a series of reports sometime soon.On a sad note, my weapon was seized at the airport. Though I'm not an "official" US marshall, you would think they would want someone like me (GREAT AMERICAN WITH GUN SKILLS) protecting the plane.FOOLS.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121795126085714262005-07-19T13:44:00.000-04:002005-07-19T13:45:26.090-04:00

. . . to do some real shoe-polish reporting.Stay tuned.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121709486819064312005-07-18T13:56:00.000-04:002005-07-18T13:59:35.120-04:00

If anyone in the Bush administration was convicted of murdering more than five people and it took place in less than two weeks, by all means I am in favor of immediate dismissal.More info on the Wilson family bomb plot later . . .

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121684298061726732005-07-18T06:51:00.000-04:002005-07-18T06:58:18.066-04:00

An extremely super-senior official with intimate knowledge of the case, and who is speaking on the condition of anonynimity for fear of the violent and often deadly wrath of the Wilson family, has informed me (NOT Jeff Gannon) that the grand jury is now looking at detailed evindence that Joe Wilson did in fact aquire yellowcake while drinking green tea in Niger and that he and his wife were

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121474028722483332005-07-15T18:39:00.000-04:002005-07-15T20:45:32.880-04:00

First of all, Karl Rove is a great American hero and Joe Wilson is a rotten Peace-Nick who wanted to destroy America. Karl Rove should get a medal for what happened. Joe Wilson should go to jail. I know what went down and even though the classy White House is refusing to pre-judge and talk about an ongoing investigation, I can't stay silent anymore.I'm a shoe-polish journalist. The BONKERS

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1121453540604039742005-07-15T14:48:00.000-04:002005-07-15T14:52:20.610-04:00

More tonight.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1116384605404650022005-05-17T22:42:00.000-04:002005-05-17T22:50:05.410-04:00

Anonymous said... Sorry, I don't get it...... 10:32 PM I don't get it either, Anonymous. I'm not sure why people are saying that I put my head together with Frank Gaffney. First of all, I'm Not James Guckert. Or Jeff Gannon. And in second place, I've never put my head together with this Frank Gaffney guy.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1116022179483245022005-05-13T18:05:00.000-04:002005-05-13T18:09:39.490-04:00

I did not put my head together with Frank Gaffney last night.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1111215130118422812005-03-19T01:51:00.000-05:002005-03-19T01:53:09.363-05:00

FIN

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1110519584910934012005-03-11T00:22:00.000-05:002005-03-11T00:51:47.950-05:00

Thousands and thousands of you have been complaining about my lack of posts lately. I am very sorry and I would love to tell you why. But since there are so many conspiracy theories out there, I don't want to dignify the absurd ones by commenting on any of them. In any case, things will hopefully be back to normal sometime soon. Believe me, there's nothing I'd rather do than shoe polish report

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1110247138750942742005-03-08T06:58:00.000-05:002005-03-08T06:57:54.646-05:00

I watched a clip of Alan Greenspan testifying before that poop-fest Committee on Banking, Housing, and Urban Affairs. I wonder why he didn't mention meeting me some years ago. C'mon Alan, think...

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109898252097191982005-03-03T17:44:00.000-05:002005-03-03T20:10:53.480-05:00

I am not doing this blog because of Rosie O'Donnell, Martin Sheen, George Clooney, Jane Fonda or Phil Donahue - they never sacrificed their lives for me or for liberty.I say we tell those liberal, tree-hugging, Birkenstock-wearing, hippie, tie-dyed liberals to go make their movies and their music and whine somewhere else. Just stay away from my blog.If they lived in Iraq or Afghanistan,

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109809095590114312005-03-02T18:28:00.000-05:002005-03-02T19:20:57.916-05:00

Many of you have been giving me grief about some of the films on my ground-breaking French New Wave Wish List. Specifically, thousands have pointed out that Claire's Knee was made in 1971, clearly outside of the French New Wave range of years. That range of years is somewhat debatable, but 1971 would never be in the discussion. I agree with Richard Neupert's definition from his excelent book, A

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109730575329500322005-03-01T19:38:00.000-05:002005-03-01T21:29:35.330-05:00

The PRESIDENT (our Commander and Chief) said some things that really made me think the other day. He was talking about social security. (I like to call it Socialist Security.) What made me think was when he talked about how unfair SS is to black people. I have always been interested in how fair different government programs are to black people. It probably ranks 7th on my list of important issues

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109723549701771742005-03-01T18:33:00.000-05:002005-03-01T19:32:29.703-05:00

Hint: These folks are involved.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109652473724972892005-02-28T23:24:00.000-05:002005-02-28T23:47:53.726-05:00

Everyone recognizes the press secretary is not the finder of facts."The briefing room has a long tradition of being home to colorful characters of the left and right." If you happen to privately be on one side, it's easier to accept facts that support your side than accept arguments that support the other side. . . . It's not out of malice. It's human nature." The press focuses on, 'Isn't

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109559870231446932005-02-27T21:59:00.000-05:002005-02-27T22:19:16.736-05:00

The Best Not Jeff Gannon Blog Network is starting to get some serious media attention:Next we’ve got a French New Wave film fanatic who describes his “weapon” as a 7.2 inch Mini Cougar. We like his blog quite a bit but he confuses us. He is always talking about the “unvarnished” truth and discusses shoe polish quite a bit like our Jeff Gannon does. What’s confusing here is that he insists in just

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109551503580969062005-02-27T19:02:00.000-05:002005-02-27T19:45:03.583-05:00

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: I think they should give it to Jamie Foxx to honor his overlooked performance in Redemption: The Stan Tookie Williams Story.BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: But not for Collateral. He needs to somehow be honored for his underappreciated performance in Breakin' All The Rules.BEST ACTRESS: You know, Jamie Foxx has never truly been honored for his work on In Living Color. I think

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109461966952899912005-02-26T18:45:00.000-05:002005-02-27T08:26:00.366-05:00

I have decided not to address any particular accusation against me. A lot of fabricated stuff is being said about me. Other stuff is true. I won't talk about either. I have admitted a love for French New Wave Films. Aren't you BONKERS witch-hunters satisfied with that? Anyway. Here's a great picture of the best first LADY in the history of first LADIES.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109435444867263602005-02-26T11:24:00.000-05:002005-02-26T11:30:44.870-05:00

See here.And here.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109429799916501822005-02-26T09:55:00.000-05:002005-02-26T09:56:39.916-05:00

But I'm still Not Jeff Gannon.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109385632653014012005-02-25T21:25:00.005-05:002005-02-25T22:05:25.586-05:00

Good Luck Everyone.The Official Application For admittance Into The Best Not Jeff Gannon Blog Network Name of Blog:Web Address: 1)Are you Jeff Gannon?2)Are you that guy who's also not really Jeff Gannon?3)Does your blog clearly state that you are not Jeff Gannon? 4)Have you checked out my exclusive French New Wave Wishlist?5)In 15 words or less, tell me why your blog deserves to be included in

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109356764758581462005-02-25T13:34:00.000-05:002005-02-25T13:41:02.220-05:00

Since it appears everyone is BONKERS wild about the idea of joining TBNJGBN, I've decided to erect an official application process. Details to follow.In the meantime, why don't you chat about what you'd like to see in a Not Jeff Gannon website.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109297285746598862005-02-24T20:08:00.000-05:002005-02-25T09:43:09.120-05:00

As many of you know, I was recently tempted by a chance to go off and hunt aliens in Arizona with my 7.2 Inch Mini Cougar. And, as many of those people know, I decided against it due to the fact that I was BONKERS mad because someone else who wasn't really Jeff Gannon started a blog.I decided to use that BONKERS energy and created The Best Not Jeff Gannon Blog Network and have purchased the

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109281422707404622005-02-24T16:41:00.000-05:002005-02-24T16:43:42.706-05:00

As many of you may know, another guy who is not really Jeff Gannon has started his own blog. I'm taking this as a personal insult to me (Not Jeff Gannon) and my blog is no longer for sale.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109215503790164262005-02-23T22:14:00.000-05:002005-02-23T22:25:03.793-05:00

As many of you know I've been contemplating joining the Minutemen and patrolling the Mexico/Arizona border with my 7.2 Inch Mini Cougar. Well I've decided to do it. I did some research and found out that they do have DVD players near Mexico and it would be no problem for me to watch my French New Wave Films while off duty. Unfortunately, that won't leave much time for blogging. So I've decided to

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109210764162024312005-02-23T21:06:00.000-05:002005-02-23T21:06:04.163-05:00

MACULINE FEMININE.flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } MASCULINE FEMININE, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. Until then, make plans to see this movie in the next two days.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109126218425084282005-02-22T20:40:00.000-05:002005-02-22T21:40:47.956-05:00

Please note: This is NOT Jeff Gannon's journal. Tuesday, October 21st 2003:Slept in late due to a long night of shoe polish reporting . . . Filled my bowl with Fruit Loops only to discover I was out of milk . . . Popped by the WH on the way to the gym and asked a question . . . Gym was packed . . . Bought milk on the way home from the gym . . . Brainstormed possible Halloween costume ideas . . .

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109122111763546942005-02-22T20:28:00.000-05:002005-02-22T20:28:31.763-05:00

.flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } Shoe Polish, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. But I guess that's the life of a shoe polish reporter. My destiny. Chat away and stay tuned.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109049686786463602005-02-22T00:24:00.000-05:002005-02-22T00:25:43.720-05:00

This is such a good idea. A man named Jim Gilchrist (Perhaps he should change his name to something easier to spell, pronounce and remember. Something like Jeff Gilchrist.) is recruiting Minuteman to help keep filthy non-Americans out of clean and dry-heated Arizona. I know I'm up for the job because when my 7.2 Inch Mini Cougar and I are in action, people often call me the Minuteman. There is

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109039607317396922005-02-21T21:33:00.000-05:002005-02-21T21:33:27.316-05:00

.flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } More Real AARP, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. Through the shear strength of my shoe polish reporting I was able to obtain an advanced copy of a future anti-AARP ad. Seriously, why would old people listen to an

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1109031462395804192005-02-21T19:17:00.000-05:002005-02-21T19:19:20.836-05:00

Those BONKERS Lefties of the AARP are really starting to frighten me with their pro-gay/anti-soldier agenda. More ads like this please..flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } The Real AARP, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. What makes this Unfiltered

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108940402201220402005-02-20T18:00:00.000-05:002005-02-20T18:00:02.200-05:00

.flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } Not Jeff Gannon Interview, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. Go watch me stick it to that BONKERS Lefty who is not Anderson Cooper.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108916292840889992005-02-20T11:08:00.000-05:002005-02-20T11:18:12.843-05:00

I'll be posting my Unvarnished and Unfiltered interview not with Anderson Cooper sometime today. It's a doozy.Feel free to chat about your favorite pseudonyms. Mine of course is Eric Rohmer. It's so much easier to spell, pronounce and remember than Jean-Marie Maurice Scherer. (Even though I just spelled and pronounced it from memory.) You can learn more about Eric Rohmer by visiting my

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108845828294648542005-02-19T15:41:00.000-05:002005-02-19T15:43:48.296-05:00

Any thoughts on the interview I didn't have with Anderson Cooper last night? I'm gathering mine and will give an unvarnished and unfiltered report sometime this weekend. (I still have some shoe polish reporting to do.)

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108770463160601242005-02-18T18:47:00.000-05:002005-02-18T18:55:45.413-05:00

.flickr-photo { border: solid 2px #000000; }.flickr-yourcomment { }.flickr-frame { text-align: left; padding: 3px; }.flickr-caption { font-size: 0.8em; margin-top: 0px; } Not a Condom, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. It's fake! Oh, thank God it's fake.Sometime last week this picture appeared out of nowhere on one of the Liberal Internets. Of course the BONKERS Left went Bonkers,

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com26tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108703375416906062005-02-17T23:29:00.000-05:002005-02-18T07:55:13.723-05:00

Let's Roll.A BONKERS Deadhead Lefty slams the site big-time:BTW this "Jeff Gannon" blog is some grade A dada humor! Whoever's writing it takes great pains to point out that he's not the real Jeff, Administration Paid Shill number whatever, but rather someone with a great Andy Kaufman sense of humor. If you read the comments you'll see there are people on both sides who are not getting the joke.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108687085333470412005-02-17T19:02:00.000-05:002005-02-17T19:58:04.800-05:00

I just wanted to thank everyone for the thoughtful comments and words of encouragement you've been sharing lately. (Especially in regards to my Shocking Announcement, which led to the revealing of my French New Wave Wish List, which is still robust.) In the early days of the site it seemed as if everyone HATED me, but I think you've responded well to my unvarnished style and now love me. (Not in

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108644910281137402005-02-17T07:46:00.000-05:002005-02-17T07:57:17.716-05:00

The Lefties in the BONKERS Left Media want it both ways. First they go BONKERS because another guy who isn't Jeff Gannon reported the President's positions in an unfiltered and unvarnished manner. Now they're all in a tizzy because a guy who really is Brit Hume didn't pass along FDR's talking points word-for-word. Anyone else smell hypocrisy?

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108603763661786802005-02-16T20:29:00.000-05:002005-02-16T20:40:43.773-05:00

French Film Invoices Originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. WARNING: A number of the links in this story are to French New Wave films, and some of those might prove shocking to some people. Please exercise your own discretion when clicking. (And, as you read, please forgive the necessary typos - I'm going for rock-hard facts, rather than spelling.)NOT WOLF BLITZER: Because one of the

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com38tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108601788174296262005-02-16T19:55:00.000-05:002005-02-16T19:56:28.176-05:00

I'm still writing. Chat away!

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108593963372824232005-02-16T17:44:00.000-05:002005-02-16T17:46:03.373-05:00

It's big. Very big. Feel free to use this thread to chat about Steve Sanders, French New Wave Cinema, or your weapon.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108524596985381842005-02-15T22:07:00.000-05:002005-02-15T22:29:56.986-05:00

The hardest part about not being Jeff Gannon is dealing with those who think they know me just because I'm not Jeff Gannon. For example, many of you just assumed that I was still sexy after all these years just because someone else who isn't Jeff Gannon claimed that he was still sexy after all these years. Of course, I later admitted that I was in fact still sexy after all these years, but that's

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108495252005226082005-02-15T14:12:00.000-05:002005-02-15T18:37:34.640-05:00

I could talk about and demonstrate my 7.2 inch Mini Cougar all day. I think I've made that pretty clear, and I don't mind that my reputation is partly based on my weapon. However, there's more to me than my weapon. In fact, I have plenty of other interests. And I'm not just talking about my love of shoe polish reporting and Steve Sanders. Stay tuned in the coming days as I reveal some of my

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108473049375293682005-02-15T08:02:00.000-05:002005-02-15T08:10:49.376-05:00

I lot of you are suggesting that I am Gen. JC Christian, patriot. Not only am I NOT Gen. JC Christian, I don't even think that's his real name. So why is he afraid to admit that he's NOT General JC Christian?

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108446154903011222005-02-15T00:42:00.000-05:002005-02-15T00:42:34.903-05:00

Steve Sanders Originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. I just wanted to make that point clear.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108443948842807672005-02-14T23:51:00.000-05:002005-02-15T00:05:48.843-05:00

A bunch of you are extremely curious about my weapon, which is fine by me. As my loyal readers surely know, I love to talk about and describe my weapon. I call it the Mini Cougar. It's total length is 7.2 inches, but it has a unique rotating barrel that is 3.7 inches alone! I often get compliments about my Mini Cougar because it accommodates smaller hands and also protects larger hands from being

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108429816856408152005-02-14T19:34:00.000-05:002005-02-14T20:10:16.856-05:00

Is the world going BONKERS? I have been very clear from the start that I am not Jeff Gannon. But now another person who is not Jeff Gannon is claiming that I am saying that I AM Jeff Gannon. It's Bonkers.To make matters worse, others are calling me a man called Jeff. The fact is, nothing could be furthur from the truth. I am NOT a man called Jeff. My loyal readers are well aware that I have been

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108418133375983392005-02-14T16:54:00.000-05:002005-02-14T16:55:33.376-05:00

More later.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108396475396958602005-02-14T10:53:00.000-05:002005-02-14T11:21:32.363-05:00

I am NOT Jeff Gannon and I am NOT toast.Edit: I AM still sexy after all these years.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108346983214866472005-02-13T21:05:00.000-05:002005-02-13T21:09:43.216-05:00

MR. McCLELLAN: Jeff, go ahead. Q Thank you. With all the reaching out that's going on around here, the President said Thursday in his press conference that he was reaching out to the press corps. What did he mean by that, and why would he feel the need to reach out to a group of supposedly non-partisan people? MR. McCLELLAN: Well, I think that was a tongue-in-cheek comment that the President made

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108167763430077082005-02-11T19:14:00.000-05:002005-02-11T19:22:43.433-05:00

This is from the August 9, 2004 Press Briefing with Scott McClellan. Note: I'm not Jeff. MR. McCLELLAN:Go ahead, Jeff.Q Thank you. The imam that was arrested in New York last week was discovered because his name appeared in a Rolodex in a terrorist training camp in Iraq before the war. The book was found after, by U.S. troops, but he was in Iraq before the war. Is this another piece of evidence

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108151409446292702005-02-11T14:41:00.000-05:002005-02-11T14:50:09.446-05:00

This is from our new curious friend Sara:Dear Jeff-Bush's girlfriend-not Gannon, Hey I just want to know if Bush found you to be sexy as well. I mean when you were licking his A$$, did he say you were sexy? And what did he call you in bed? Jeff or bushy as well. Thanks!Hi Sara. I generally don't like to comment on individual opinions of my sexiness. I can say that I do consider myself still sexy

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108093442060461642005-02-10T22:35:00.000-05:002005-02-10T22:44:02.060-05:00

Not being Jeff Gannon is a full time job. I understood that when I made the decision to reveal that I wasn't Jeff Gannon or anyone else who really wasn't Jeff Gannon. People want to get close to me (Not Jeff Gannon) and I understand that.But could everyone please stop following me when I make one of my three daily trips to Church? (Not a Mosque.) Now you know four things about me that aren't

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108080298001348702005-02-10T19:02:00.000-05:002005-02-10T19:04:58.000-05:00

THE PRESIDENT: All right. Sukha Brooks. Q Hi, good evening, Mr. President. THE PRESIDENT: Sukha, where do you live? MS. BROOKS: I live in Morton, Pennsylvania. THE PRESIDENT: Morton, Pennsylvania. MS. BROOKS: Morton, Pennsylvania. THE PRESIDENT: And? MS. BROOKS: I'm currently going through a divorce, and I have three children. Social Security is very important to me. I'm 37 years

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108068434184199882005-02-10T16:37:00.000-05:002005-02-10T15:54:15.076-05:00

Dory said... Drew Barrymore?!?!? Where are the Hot Military Studs? Hi Dory. You must be new. I guess I should review some things. I am not Jeff Gannon and I'm not claiming to be someone else who isn't Jeff Gannon. I am also not claiming to be anyone who used to pretend he was Jeff Gannon. Since I've clearly told you who I'm NOT, let me tell you a few things that I am: 1) Still sexy after all

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108066589404978522005-02-10T15:16:00.000-05:002005-02-10T15:16:29.403-05:00

Drew 1 Originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. PDC wins. I think it was more shoe polish reporting than guess. Well done.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108062208127883672005-02-10T14:03:00.000-05:002005-02-10T15:10:39.446-05:00

Guess The Lefty Originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon. I'll give the answer in a bit. Get those guesses in ASAP. Winner gets a question of his/her choice in the Mailbag. (Not an actual mailbag.)

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108057933995685002005-02-10T12:40:00.000-05:002005-02-10T12:52:13.996-05:00

Being sexy after all these years is really a state of mind. I don't know if any of you have ever played competitive sports - - - I did, bigtime- - - but it's sort of like being in the zone. I went for months at a time when I couldn't help spinning that discus (I was a nationally ranked discus hurler) farther than anyone else. It was a state of mind. Just like being sexy after all these years.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108050780973249852005-02-10T10:48:00.000-05:002005-02-10T10:53:00.983-05:00

Here's an Unvarnished quote. Try finding this in the Lefty Media: "I have asked, and Walter Dellinger has kindly agreed to come. He is a practicing attorney. He is a professor. He's so good at being an attorney, he's teaching others how to be an attorney, at Duke University, if I'm not mistaken. He was telling me today -- I don't know if you know this or not, this falls in the "small world"

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1108039884910933572005-02-10T07:16:00.000-05:002005-02-10T07:51:24.910-05:00

Whenever I'm having a stressful day, I find it comforting to check out a movie and let the real world fade away for a couple hours. Yesterday I needed a movie more than ever because I was stressed to the max. So I decided to check out Million Dollar Baby. I liked the movie a lot, but I don't want to spoil it for everyone. I will say that the ending is fabulous and you really only need to see

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1107993376453250922005-02-09T18:54:00.000-05:002005-02-09T18:56:16.453-05:00

I'm off to celebrate Chinese New Year for a bit. (Not America's New Year) Expect a late-night review of the new Hillary Swank movie, Million Dollar Baby. Chat Away!

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1107984452027952262005-02-09T16:19:00.000-05:002005-02-09T16:35:27.606-05:00

My new prolific friend PlasticDeckCup said... "What's it like being a crazy kick-ass journalist?" PDC, I don't really think of myself as that. I'm more of a shoe polish journalist. Do you mind if I call you PDC? Paul said... "I'm really glad that I don't read this and just want to say that if I wasn't gay I'd find you not very attractive." Paul, I know I stated earlier that I am not

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10470470.post-1107967445250439182005-02-09T11:42:00.000-05:002005-02-09T11:44:05.250-05:00

There are a lot of varnished facts out there right now. So let me just restate that I am not Jeff Gannon and I am also not pretending to be someone else who isn't Jeff Gannon and who may or may not have retired from not being Jeff Gannon. I am just a simple shoe polish reporter from the new media.

J. Gannonnoreply@blogger.com29