Jeff Gannon Blog

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Leftywood Is Alive And Liberal

A source familiar with the situation has contacted me here in Niger (where I am investigating the WILSON FAMILY BOMB PLOT)and revealed the truth behind today's episode of Inside Politics on the LEFTIST CNN LIBERAL NETWORK.

A team of LIBERAL HOLLYWOOD/FRENCH FILMMAKERS AND GEEKY LEFTIST TECHNICIANS have been working for 2 years on a CGI version of the HONORABLE ROBERT NOVAK. Not Bob (as the crew calls him) was unveiled today. The episode was directed by JEAN LUC GODARD (which breaks my heart)and conceived by KNOWN PRANKSTER ASHTON KUTCHER. Carville, of course, was played by actor James Carville. The host was some LIB TOOL. Oliver Stone and the TRAITOR FROM THE DIXIE TRICKS did the CGI animation. CRACK-POT JANEANE GARAFALO created the voice of Robert Novak using a FANCY LIBERAL COMPUTER PROGRAM.

Robert Novak also has an alibi and I can vouch for it because I was with him. BOB'S IN NIGER DOING SOME SHOE-POLISH REPORTING HIMSELF!


The SAD THING is that he's going to have to publicly apologize because the media is owned by OLIVER STONE'S FRIENDS and they would never report the story.

Poor Bob Novak. At least my MILLIONS OF FANS will know the truth.


  • leftywood is way too liberal for me. that's why i work in tarzana.

    By Anonymous not mary cary (porn star and republican), at 10:24 PM  

  • the bonkers liberal hollywood elite wont even let me read for a role anymore. i can play anything...even a bonkers liberal. i was alan derschowitz for god's sake.

    By Anonymous not ron silver, at 10:26 PM  

  • it's no wonder...the jews run everything--not that im anti-semitic or anything. but it's the jews. they killed christ, you know.

    By Anonymous not mel gibson, at 10:28 PM  

  • there are a lot of commies in hollywood. in fact, i called it; "commiewood".

    By Anonymous elia kazan, at 10:30 PM  

  • oliver stone is the most whacked out drug addled bonkers liberal in hollyweird. he's always putting forth some far fetched conspiracy theory in a futile attempt to re-write history.

    By Anonymous regnery publishing, at 10:34 PM  

  • we are calling on all god fearing christian members to boycott oliver stone's film about the rescue of two port authority policeman on 9/11. it is filled with inaccuracies and lies.

    By Anonymous not move america forward, at 10:36 PM  

  • bob novak is aces with us.

    leftywood liberals...not so much.

    By Anonymous not the white house, at 10:39 PM  

  • it's this kind of shoe polish reporting that endears me to you. i have taken it upon myself to nominate you for a nobel prize.

    By Anonymous not sean hannity, at 10:39 PM  

  • i hope jeannene stays in hollywood.

    By Anonymous not sam sedar, at 10:41 PM  

  • oliver stone is a war hero. show some goddamn respect.

    i have no sense of humor, and i hate america.

    By Anonymous a proud bonkers liberal, at 10:42 PM  

  • I don't care if you are a male
    prostitute with herpes!

    your still hot!

    woot woot!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:58 PM  

  • im watching the daily show right now, and let me tell you something; jon stewart (yes--a jew) is not an objective journalist. he is symptomatic of the liberal bias that exists in the mainstream media.

    hopefully "cooter" will kick the shit out of ed helms. if he does, i'll give him a medal.

    By Anonymous not john gibson, at 11:17 PM  

  • not only does oliver stone re-write history, he's also half french.

    By Anonymous not jonah goldberg, at 11:20 PM  

  • i have it on good authority that cnn loves the french.

    By Anonymous not roger ailes, at 11:33 PM  

  • your reporting it far too potent for us to compete. how are you so potent?

    By Anonymous not peter daou, at 11:41 PM  

  • Sometimes that other guy whose name isn't Jeff Gannon says that all lefties like me are like Cuban Communists, and sometimes he says we're all like Al Jazeera Islamic radicals.

    I'm so confused! Talk about an identity crisis!

    By Blogger Princess Sparkle Pony, at 11:27 AM  

  • It's because you're FLIP FLOPPERS like John Kerry.

    By Blogger J. Gannon, at 11:49 AM  

  • flip flopper kerry? what about flip flopper bush? "war on terror" to the "global struggle against radical extremism". how do you explain that.
    or this gem; "i don't believe in nation building" now--IRAQ. fought against the creation of a 9/11 commission--then went ahead and permitted it (though he underfunded it, and needed a goddamn babysitter to answer any questions so i guess that doesn't really count.)
    this is my favorite; he gets on his bicycle and then promptly falls off of it. dubya is the biggest flip flopper of all.
    by the way, my weapon is much bigger than yours!

    By Anonymous gore really won, at 2:16 PM  

  • I LOVE Jon Stewart...much closer to a "truth teller" than most so-called real journalists. This not J. Gannon couldn't touch Jon's pant cuff (he'd probably like to)...

    By Anonymous Londubh, at 8:19 PM  


    Damn! Jeff Gannon is really Robert McElwaine! (

    And thus, the Great Chain Of Internet Being is fulfilled.

    By Anonymous Will Parker, at 12:53 AM  

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