Jeff Gannon Blog

Monday, February 21, 2005

A Potpourri Of Unvarnished Thoughts (New Regular Feature)

Those BONKERS Lefties of the AARP are really starting to frighten me with their pro-gay/anti-soldier agenda. More ads like this please.

The Real AARP, originally uploaded by Not Jeff Gannon.

What makes this Unfiltered declaration of truth even more powerful is that it's got the Rock Hard integrity of the Swift Boat Veterans behind it. Like I said, more of this please.

Although I used to be a nationally ranked discuss hurler my favorite sport to watch is baseball and my favorite team is the Red Sox. Curt Schilling sure knows his politics.

Can anyone recommend a good razor blade? Mine is just not cutting it.

Today the President told that BONKERS Lefty Jacques Chirac that he's "lookng for a new cowboy." Mr. President, me and my 7.2 Inch Mini Cougar are ready. Just say the word.

And finally, although his reporting was Ultra-Super Varnished and most certainly BONKERS to the core, I must admit Hunter S. Thompson was a giant influence on me. He proved that journalists can come in all sorts of varieties. Rest in peace.

15 Comments:

  • dr. thompson was most certainly bonkers and drug addled, and a heathen, and had a slight drinking problem, but never-the-less, he was a member in good standing.

    i'm not french.

    By Anonymous not wayne lapierre (not the executive vice president/chief executive officer of the nra), at 7:34 PM  

  • it doesn't come as any shock to me that the aarp are full of selfish hedonists and sodomites.

    not jeff, our liter will be devine and 100% heterosexual.

    By Anonymous daughter of the american revolution, at 7:38 PM  

  • curt schilling is not only the finest hurler in the game, who like our beloved not jeff isn't afraid to go high and hard, but an intelligent man who knows politics much better than that commie pinko terrorist lovin' carlos delgado...who used to be canadian.

    probably gay too.

    By Anonymous not dan bartlett (not white house communications director), at 7:44 PM  

  • i was in the board room when not christine donohoo who is not the executive director of aarp communications said; "let's support gay marriage while we simultaneously not support the troops". They are not being honest when they say they support the troops.

    By Anonymous not the swift boat veterans of the aarp, at 7:55 PM  

  • i forgot...SLUTS, SODOMITES, AARP MEMBERS, AND CURT SCHILLING STAY AWAY FROM MY MAN!

    By Anonymous daughter of the american revolution, at 7:56 PM  

  • not jeff, come over...i'll be happy to shave you.

    By Anonymous not scott mcclellan, at 7:58 PM  

  • ps...im looking for a new cowboy too.

    By Anonymous not scott mcclellan, at 8:00 PM  

  • why our fearless leader is courting those cheese eating surrender monkeys is mystery to me.

    quit sending me feathers, im not a fucking chickenhawk, my family can't afford it if i volunteered to go to iraq. which i would do if it weren't for my family that i love very much, too much, to go engage those fucking chickenshit ragheads in that third world shit hole that makes other third world shitholes look like fucking xandu.

    do you think im overweight?

    By Anonymous not jonah goldber (not of the weekly standard), at 8:04 PM  

  • we will be launching a full fledged investigation into the aarp's ties to the homosexual community and theiry unpatriotic decision to not support the troops.

    By Anonymous not alberto gonzalez (not the attorney general), at 8:07 PM  

  • Forget about shaving, NJG. A manly beard would be just scrumptuously butch and it would provide a nice balance to your chromium dome.

    By Blogger steverford, at 8:09 PM  

  • sf,
    you did receive and sign your loyalty oath with the oath of secrecy that wasn't sent over concerning the events of the other night that never happened, didn't you?

    By Anonymous not karl rove, at 8:19 PM  

  • njg, thank you for the potpouri of unvarnished thoughts, it's such relief to get unvarnished thoughts when so often i find myself being overwhelmed by the potpouri of completely varnished thoughts of the bonkers liberal media pundits. your punditry is one of a kind, but what else should we expect from a shoe polish reporter like yourself.

    it is my obligation to read the not jeff gannon blog everyday. i also used to send fan letters to richard nixon.

    By Anonymous not brian williams (not the anchor of the nbc nightly news), at 8:33 PM  

  • while i certainly don't share not jeff gannon's politics, i do share his appreciation for french new wave cinema.

    By Anonymous not jaque chirac, at 9:10 PM  

  • Not Karl Rove,

    Not to worry, I didn't sign the secrecy oath with my auto pen. And I told Ann Coulter that if she didn't sign it, she'd have to do a 3-way with Dick and Liz.

    SF

    By Blogger steverford, at 5:58 AM  

  • You might want to reconsider your support for the Red Sox. The owners and the dreamy young general manager are all BONKERS Lefties.

    By Anonymous not alex rodriguez, at 5:02 PM  

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