Jeff Gannon Blog

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Old School Reporting

I appologize for not posting yesterday, but I think you'll be more than happy with the scoop I've managed to aquire. Like I said, I am a shoe polish reporter. It's what I do. So yesterday I read a story on the main page of the White House web site, and I am now prepared to report that President Bush met with the NBA Champion Detroit Pistons and correctly dubbed them "liberators." Here's the ACTUAL quote:

"I also appreciate the fact that you've been involved in great causes like teaching children how to read. I can't think of a more important cause than lending a gift of knowledge to a child. I remember the time in Houston, Texas, when a woman walked up to me and she said, reading is the new civil right. I thought that was such a powerful phrase. If you believe that, if you believe you liberate people by teaching them to read, consider yourself liberators as a result of being in the program, 'Read to Achieve.'"

Also significant is Commander-and-Chief Bush's admission that he was informed by a woman in Houston that reading is the new civil right.

I haven't seen this information anywhere in the mainstream super liberal media.


  • Please direct me to this new "super liberal media". I wouldn't mind reading something enlightening for a change.

    (BTW, reading, etc. It's been around a long time. Remember Ben Franklin? Libraries. Ya. That commie-pinko socialist liberal Ben Franklin.)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:42 PM  

  • I don't care what nationality you are. YOu're doing a helluva fine job. IF your polish, so what? Eastern europe is joining the rest of the world. I really like your comments and its stuff i don't hear from the MSM. I like that a lot. Goog going Jeff. Your all righit in my book!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:15 PM  

  • I'd love to read your book sometime.

    By Blogger J. Gannon, at 9:21 PM  

  • You report on shoe polish? Doesn't that get boring? I mean, there aren't that many colors and the technology hasn't changed for years. Plus, nobody polishes their shoes any more.

    You might want to consider a new line of work.

    By Blogger rhetoretician, at 12:48 PM  

  • Haha. I apologize for not explaining. That's my fault as a journalist.

    A shoe polish journalist is someone who works hard to present the unvarnished and unfiltered position of the administration in power. This benifits you, the consumer of my journalism.

    By Blogger J. Gannon, at 12:54 PM  

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